Members of a popular internet forum were disgusted after a woman revealed the secret meaning behind a necklace given to her by her fiance.
In a viral Reddit post that serves as an update to a separate thread covered by news week Last year, Redditor u/BlueRoses95 (aka the original poster) said that after refusing to remove the necklace at her friend’s wedding in 2021, she was briefed on the unsavory story attached to the piece.
The since-deleted post published on r/AmITeA**hole received almost 15,000 upvotes and 2,000 comments in the last day.
When she wrote that her friend “Mary” insisted that she take off the necklace at her wedding, the original poster said she refused at the moment and as a result lost all contact with Mary for almost a year.
However, following a recent tragedy, the original poster also said she made amends with Mary and figured out why the necklace was so controversial in the first place.
“In September, [Mary’s father] deceased,” OP wrote. “I decided to visit her at home the next night, unsolicited with some cooked food…Mary was excited to see me, hugged me and told me to sit with her.
“Mary told me she needed to talk to me about her marriage…she said she recognized it [the necklace] from years ago,” OP continued. “As my fiancé and [her sister] were in high school, he jokingly asked her…[she] used to be very overweight… and later, when he was supposed to pick her up, he left a bunch of bacon and chips and a stuffed animal pig wearing the necklace on her doorstep.
“I pressed [my fiancé] and finally he told me it was true, but it was just a high school prank,” OP added. “I asked him if he gave me that necklace like that [Mary’s sister] would see it. He said yes, but he thought she’d get the joke.”
Coming to terms with a romantic partner’s past is rarely easy.
From their dating history to their financial choices and education levels, the skeletons in a partner’s metaphorical closet can be scary and, in some cases, an automatic dealbreaker.
However, criminal convictions are often to be expected, because as the saying goes: everyone makes mistakes.
When couples believe in their relationship, honest communication is almost always the answer to reconciliation with each other’s pasts. When both partners are able – and willing – to share their life stories without omitting key moments that could become problematic, there is a much greater chance of moving beyond past events.
When one or both partners are dishonest, problems arise.
“If you’re dating someone and they haven’t given you a reason not to trust them, their past probably isn’t an issue that will negatively impact your relationship,” claims Marriage.com expert Rachael Pace. “But you need to know your partner’s past to feel comfortable building a future together.”
Concluding her viral Reddit post, the original poster said she was shocked by her fiancé’s youthful actions and even more disturbed by the fact that he encouraged her to wear a necklace to a wedding where he knew both the would upset the bride as well as her sister.
The original poster also said she had concerns about her upcoming marriage and that the couple had not communicated since she discovered the necklace’s true meaning.
“I’m still not sure at this point what’s going to happen,” OP said news week. “I haven’t spoken to him since.”
In the comments section of the viral post, many Redditors were just as horrified as the original poster and agreed that OP should seriously reevaluate their relationship.
“Yikes,” wrote Redditor u/pjpotter14 in the top comment of the post, which received almost 20,000 upvotes. “What a terrible thing to do to someone.
“And then to specifically bring it up again at her sister’s wedding[?]’ they asked. “It’s just so messed up. I would break off the engagement [because] it sounds like he’s finally shown his true colors.”
Redditor u/Schulle2105, whose comment received almost 5,000 upvotes, echoed this opinion.
“It’s bad enough what he did in high school, but he doesn’t seem to have changed a bit,” they wrote. “Instead of apologizing, he still confronts the sister afterwards and tries to play innocent.
“Right now I would take a step back in this relationship and wonder where is this going to go if you just accept it with no consequences,” they continued.
“Seriously, to deny it and THEN berate it was ‘no big deal’ eff that,” chipped in Redditor u/Ponceludonmalavoix, receiving almost 8,000 upvotes. “This guy sucks. When the honeymoon is over, you bet he’s going to be a total turd.”
Have you noticed any red flags that made you want to end a relationship? Let us know at [email protected] We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.